When I was in China, one of my friends told me she was having a little fun at The Onion’s Personals Page. I decided to get into the act with a comical ad. This was my most recent response:

hey. i like you. you sound like the kind of guy i could fuck senseless and confess to my hidden dostoevskian yearnings to. to whom. ah, fuck it.

This was from a 33 year old California girl with the nickname CreamyThighs. I don’t really know what “Dostoevskian yearnings” are; I just emit that existentialist vibe.

I guess when you got it, you got it.