Tonight, I was the Beer Baron.

The Nanhai Normal School was throwing a party for their graduates (41 of which were my students) and they had reserved an entire restaurant for the occasion. I was invited and was having a wonderful time until I ran out of beer. I asked for another, and the waitress said no.

HUH?

The students at my table clarified that they only allowed two bottles of beer per table. I understood why that was the case and had to immediately commit acts of subterfuge. I went out and bought more beer.

Like a party that had, if I may be so bold as to say, run out of beer, the students were losing interest. I went across the street and loaded up a box full of “Pijiu” (Mandarin for beer) and brought it back. The first batch got the crowd going, the second set them into a frenzy, and when the beer entered the third time, people were attacking me. I tried my best to distribute it evenly, but even the best laid plans go awry. I ended up bringing about five or six cases into the fray and every drop of the stuff was consumed. People were gong wild with every new case that was brought in, so naturally, I couldn’t stop bringing in more.

I know they were going crazy for the beer and not for me, but I didn’t care. To see the looks on their faces when I brought in another shipment was payment enough. I mean, come on; I bought enough beer for 100 people to solidify some state of drunkenness for about $20. That’s a deal and a half if you ask me.