Me : I am drunk

Me : and you gteto talk to drunk paatrick

ExGF : I love drunk Patrick!

Me : heeeeey

ExGF : I was trizashed last night

Me : thre last time I remrember talking to you drunk was fophomore year Me : and I waled asround a fresakinn girel’ds HS because I was so frusdtreated

Me : because you were asleep orewouldn’t talk to me

Me : do you remember the time I aM TALKING ABOUT

ExGF : What?

ExGF : What does this mean: “and I waled asround a fresakinn girel’ds HS because I was so frusdtreated”

Me : hahahahhahahahahhahaha

ExGF : What were you frustrated for?

ExGF : Were you sexually frustrated?

Me : I walked around a private girls’ schol because I was frustrated with what you thoughht was

Me : no oitalacs meant

ExGF : With what I thought?

ExGF : You’re sloppy, dude. This is hilarious

Me : I don’t tremeember

ExGF : Right, so you walked around the girls’ school because you were frustrated about what?

Me : I was frustrated abiytbytou nbot believing me about omething

ExGF : Hmm– I don’t know what it is I didn’t believe

Me : I don’trrenmember either

Me : there was a time where I was IMing you fir a while and you refused to talk to me

Me : what the hell did I say anyway?

ExGF : I don’t remember why I would have refused to talk to you

ExGF : You mean then or now?

Me : then

Me : after vanelntines

ExGF : How can January be after Valentine’s?

Me : it was after I Imed you one night and i SAID somenting I should’5t habe or something

Me : it was march or so

ExGF : January, February, March– good work

ExGF : I have no idea. I have always been pretty moody

Me : I’ll chslk it up to that

ExGF : . . . not to the fact that you were probably an asshole?

Me : maybe

ExGF : You did say something mean to me after we broke up, but I can’t remember what it was

Me : that;s the time

Me : well, not something like “I oldy did it to provbe I wasn’t shallow”

Me : which was some kind or reeeeeeeeedonculous slam,

Me : I feel bad avout that

ExGF : Only did what?

Me : went outwith this gril

ExGF : You mean you did it with an ugly chick or something?

Me : linnsdsay kay … she wasnt’ ugly, she just wsn hot

Me : IyamwhatIayamand that’sallthatIyam

Me : OK, gon to bed

ExGF : You’re funny, eminem

Me : Ithat was popeye

ExGF : goodnight drunk Patrick

Me : talk to you doon

Me : I mean, not soon

ExGF : Not soon?

Me : drunk patrick doesn’t come on that often